Survival Mode and the Aftermath

For three weeks, I took a break from all the extra stuff in my life. If it didn't have a looming deadline or a scheduled time, I let it fall.

It had to happen. December is the busiest month for our family, and I didn't have time for anything extra. Just my day-to-day was too much. I went into my survival mode. I just had to get through the days and not drop the ball on anything. If I got in a walk with the dog, great. If I didn't have time for even that amount of exercise, that's okay, too. No judgements.

It applied to my eating, too. I ate things that I haven't eaten since college (with good reason). I did what was easy and pleasing, and I didn't worry about it. It was nice at first. Then it wasn't anymore. There is a reason I eat well and try to take care of myself. After days of poor eating and little exercise, I felt awful. Problems that I haven't had in six years came back.

I'm done with it. I do not want to eat like this anymore. I'm looking forward to a day of salads. I'm itching to get in a run -  even if I have to run on my treadmill. I'm ready to go back to what works and what I enjoy.

I'm ready to start training again. It freaks me out to admit it, but I am starting to work toward a running goal. A half marathon. I used to run 13.1 miles without a problem, but I am pretty far away from that now. I'm starting over. Not quite back at square one but close.

I'm setting mini-goals and trying to remember how I started the last time. I'm definitely ready for the change. My friend asked me about my resolutions for 2016, and I started thinking about what I really want out of life. What's working and what isn't. Mostly, I am pretty pleased with my life.

I don't usually make resolutions since I tend to always have mini-goals going year-round. In the past, I would make resolutions about my health and weight, but I'd fail or change course during the year. I like mini-goals better. They're easier to achieve and create lasting habits. It works better than trying to change everything all at once. Baby steps.

I am going to make fun resolutions this year. I want to read a new book every month. I want to climb 10 mountains this year. I want to go somewhere new.

I have other goals - health, writing, peacefulness - , but they are not resolutions. They're big goals that may take longer than a year to complete. They may change as I go along. They're the constant goals that I am always working toward in one way or another.

I want my resolutions to be something I look forward to. Something I enjoy and can share with others. I won't want to blow them off, and they'll add so much more to my life than a resolution to lose 20 pounds.

Now that I'm getting myself back on track, I'm going to try to keep up with the blog. It will help keep me accountable for my training, too. I'm really going to focus on sticking to a training plan and training with a positive attitude. I've been feeling very negative about running, and that's not going to help me achieve my goals.

I'll write another time about my goals and what I'm doing to reach them, but for now, I am back to the blog, back to taking care of myself, and looking forward to a fun 2016.